With Comprehension comes radical and inevitable changes, the veil falls and the truth reveals itself naked and immutable before your eyes. Everything that people think is important and makes sense looks completely absurd and insignificant. And what people don't even see is Perfect, beautiful, complete, and doesn't need words.
Spiritual practices, formerly motivated by a need to connect or to find meaning and purpose, decay and cease naturally, without any intent or effort to stop or continue them; they simply do not arise. What happens happens spontaneously.
The truth cannot be expressed
The final Truth, Consciousness, Presence, cannot be expressed, cannot be thought of or verbalized, since it cannot be constructed as an idea. Our language, as well as the thoughts and concepts that structure it, are essentially dual and unable to conceptualize or conceive anything outside of duality. And without words, there are no corresponding thoughts; and without thoughts, there are no experiences... Truth is always here, right in front of everybody, but nobody sees it.
Life unfolds without a plan and "I don't know" is the only constant
Existence unfolds spontaneously as a free and endless dance, changing and flowing endlessly without purpose or predefined destiny. There is nothing that needs to happen or that doesn't need to happen. There is no goal, no purpose, no “why".
When the wind blows southward, the leaf that has fallen from the tree will fly southward, dancing in harmony with its destiny. It doesn't question: "Wasn't I supposed to fly north? Who is responsible for this?" The Universe will remain silent no matter how many times we ask, “Why?”. "I don't know" is the only constant in this dance.
To flow means to dance with the wind in the same direction. We don't ask why it flows in that direction because now we know we don't know. We cannot control the terms and conditions of each result by looking for a cause that resonates logically, for there is none.
Existence, Consciousness or Presence simply is. Existence has only one quality, to exist. Therefore, what exists simply exists. It doesn't need to justify its existence by asking: Why does it exist? Existence exists because that is the quality that exhibits, to exist. It does not exist under a predetermined reason, purpose or destiny.
The question "why?" has no fundamental answer
The question "why?" lacks a fundamental answer. Most people go through life constantly asking "why?" and unknowingly accepting answers that don't answer the question. If we ask why the sky is blue, the answer, whether it is scientific or mythical or poetic, doesn't tell us why the sky is blue, but rather how it is that the sky is blue.
We talk about the "why," but we answer by giving reasons about how without realizing that the "why" remains unanswered. And it is because, fundamentally, there is no answer, there is no "why". Everything emerges spontaneously in Consciousness.
All of us have experienced some form of tragedy, violence, loss, misfortune or pain. Some more than others. There is no escape from this. It is inherent to human nature that this dreamed "reality" is experienced as pleasure and pain, as good things and bad things, and that no one knows what the next moment will bring or what the overall outcome for a particular body/mind will be like.
Nothing like suffering and pain to provoke questions. The question "why?" leads nowhere; it is nothing more than the mind/ego seeking to gain a non-existent state of control. The mind/ego never achieves satisfaction and the "whys" only lead to resentment and more suffering.
The futility of questions
When you have the idea, the misconception that there is a separate entity here then you have the belief that questions are important. When any question arises in the context of Presence, any question is dissolved. Everything is simply as it is and any question is revealed to be meaningless.
For example, with the simple question "What are you doing?", one can only laugh or shrug, unless one feels that the questioner is truly open to hearing the authentic answer: " Doing? Me? There is no "I" that "does" anything, there never has been. And if it were possible for you, you would also see that there is no "you" that "does" any "thing", nor is there any "thing" that "we" can do. All there is is Consciousness, flowing, flowing through all these instruments in such a way that, in accordance with the perfect unfolding of the whole, it is perceived as if there were discrete individual entities performing actions autonomously, but that is really not the case. There is no separate individual, entity or I who does anything or who is something, not even who can be awake or enlightened.
The eternal not knowing
It's actually very simple. There are no beliefs. Either you know something or you don't. If you know something, you don't need to believe it's true or have faith that it's true; you know it beyond any doubt, it simply is, and there is no belief involved.
On the other hand, if you don't know something, the honest thing is to affirm that you don't know it. But of course, there are many psychological and political and social reasons why people can't admit, even to themselves, that they don't know something, so it gives rise to a belief; which essentially consists in not knowing if something is really true, but you pretend that you do. That's the activity of the dreamstate The truth is that there is only one thing that is not of the dream, one thing that can be known, and it is the basic consciousness 'I Am'. Everything else are just concepts, constructs of the mind in the dream, something that "I don't know". Everything.
The realization that I don't know anything increases more and more. As a separate entity, I am not; this whole world is not; all there is is is Presence flowing here in a perfect Pouring; and this Presence is what "I" is. But this is not even something that is known: it is what I Am. And apart from that, everything is just "I don't know".
"Remain in the state of not knowing,
work effortlessly, help others
and live in abundance."
- Sri Shibendu Lahiri -
The role of the false sense of individuality is to hide you from the truth.
Please note that the part that follows is very rational and quite simple, but also very transformative if fully understood. It is rare to find someone who has thought of the concept that follows, and even more who has truly understood it. It is the secret of life and death, and the certain knowledge inherent in awakening.
If "this", the world of things and ideas, is contemplated as the real, the truth, "reality", then "That" which is completely and radically "not this", for which there are no words or ideas within "this", will necessarily be contemplated as nothing, not something, unreal, Void. Therefore, it can be feared, malicious, denied.
Only when "this", the so-called "reality", is completely perceived as an illusion similar to a dream, that which is "not this" will be perceived at the same time as What Is. Therefore, the Void is not your enemy, but is what you truly are; and the function of the non-existent, of the false sense of an individual self, is to hide this truth from you.
Fear and avoidance are seen to be out of place; in fact, now it is impossible to feel them; they disappear, and the heart returns from the illusion of "this" and opens up to What Is. Knowing that its true glory resides where it ceases to exist.
There's nothing you can do to wake up
There are no prerequisites, there is nothing you have to do beforehand for Comprehension to happen. If awakening is going to happen, it will happen. No amount of teaching or practice can make it happen. The "bang" of the shift of focus cannot be taught; it cannot even be done. It has to happen by itself.
No one at all can directly express What Is or what It looks like. But if you pay attention to the Teaching and follow it, and by an unexplainable grace it penetrates and settles in you, it is possible that there will be an experience or a direct understanding of that to which the Teaching points, of that to which the Teaching refers indirectly.
Of course, nothing may still happen; there is no guarantee. But if someone has the inclination to try, he will have to start somehow.
Tree 1: What did you do to lose your leaves?
Tree 2: Nothing, it just happened.
Tree 1: But what can I do to lose my leaves?
Tree 2: Nothing, it will happen when it happens.
Student: What did you do to lose your "I"?
Master: Nothing just happened.
Student: But what can I do to lose my "I"?
Master: Nothing will happen when it happens.
Stories are nurtured by the need for individualization
The stories that we, the dreamed characters, tell over and over again to ourselves and others are just a way to keep the dream alive. There's nothing going on here. It's just something to entertain yourself with "until the arrival of Jesus!".
Telling stories and keeping the dream is simply the desire to be. And more than that, it is the desire to be "someone separate," someone special; someone with their own story. The dream character is completely trapped in this weaving of the personal web, in this constructing and sustaining the personal story, driven by that unknown and unnoticed urge to affirm and reconfirm the constant projection of the individual self.
It is very likely that awakening does not occur while pursuing a story, while cultivating the need to nurture the sense of being a separate self that does not exist. Awakening occurs when one sees in a irrevocable way that this desire is misguided, when one sees that it is futile. The storytelling then ceases. And then the story ceases. This is what it is like to go further.
Observe, what do you really want?
If you're going to do something, do the following: Think first if you truly want to awaken, to enlighten yourself. Do you really want to die? Do you really want for "you" to cease to exist and then go on living, if you survive, not like the one you know and love, but like an empty shell encouraged by an impersonal Consciousness? If this is what you want (which is unlikely), then what you are talking about is waking up from the false dream of individuality; and if this is so, then move on. Your thoughts, your prayers, your meditations, your questions in the satsangs or whatever you "do" you will do it from the awareness that that which you believe yourself to be is an illusion, and you will do it with the attempt to explode, to destroy that illusion called "you".
Awakening is your own death. Not the physical death -the bodies are disposable containers; look around you, they are continually being recycled-, but the real death, as real as death can be it: the death of the one who cares.
Chogyam Trungpa puts it this way: "The bad news is that you are falling through the air, there is nothing to hold on to, without a parachute. The good news is there's no ground."
Now, if you decide that what you really want is something other than this complete and definitive "awakening," bless you! Then start a wonderful life; enjoy the incredible and opulent banquet of material and spiritual and psychological treats out there. Increase and expand and change and develop and improve your life immeasurably; evolve and become more mature and deep and wise and beautiful. Discover your higher self and your higher purpose and realise them. I tell you this with all sincerity; and even, from what I see, with a delicious touch of melancholy from what is left of the memory before awakening. This is not some sort of second-class status at all; there is no such thing. Take what the dream has to offer; that's why the dream exists: to enjoy it. The only thing Consciousness does is to enjoy it, to perceive it absolutely, and it does so through the dream characters, and there must be some through whom the enjoyment of the whole range offered by the spiritual market can be experienced.
But in that case don't come here talking about awakening; it just doesn't make any sense at all.
Stop feeding the idea of yourself
The invitation here is precisely to stop telling yourself the story. When the sense of being an individual self disappears, this story, which seems so extremely important and with which one is so deeply fond that it ends up turning us into what we believe ourselves to be, is seen as what it is, a cheap and trivial novel that is poorly told; the sense of self vanishes like smoke in the air. This is the invitation to awakening: to abandon this constant feeding the belief in yourself as the individual separate self, and thus emerge from the shadows.
If Comprehension has not yet occurred, the realization of the non-existence of the separate self but you feel an inclination to understand it or feel it, at least lean in that direction by acting in accordance with what you have directly or indirectly understood.
That is the invitation. Stop feeding the idea of a separate "I", stop feeding the ego, that sense of separate consciousness that clings to practices and beliefs and builds itself up as a special being with its own history. If you are inclined to realize the non-existence of "you", then stop building yourself.
You do not realize the non-existence of the "I" by perfecting your character within the dream, but by freeing yourself from it. There is no truth in the ego, so no degree of mastery over the "I" results in anything true.
Paying attention to the ego simply reinforces it.
Adyashanti said, "Spirituality has nothing to do with improving your status in the dream state. Spiritual progress inflicts no ego damage, spirituality will usually reinforce rather than dismantle one's self-image."
The biggest challenge for most spiritual seekers is to surrender their own importance, and to see the emptiness of their own personal history. It is your personal history that you need to awaken from in order to be free.
"In due time you will realize that your true glory resides where you cease to exist."
- Ramana Maharshi -
The process of deprogramming or untruth realization
If we wish to open ourselves to the realization of the non-existence of the I, we can lean towards the idea and decide to embrace the process of deconstruction of the I, of the ego, of the fictional character that we have built and sustained all our lives.
The process of realizing the truth is a process of deprogramming, an honest process of analysis and deconstruction of ideas, opinions, beliefs, opening our eyes with wonder and honesty. Nothing is protected, nothing is sacred, divine or worthy of not being reviewed. It is a process of unlearning what is not true.
Jed McKenna uses the term "untruth realization. Because before Comprehension, one does not realize the truth, but undergoes the long process of unlearning what is not true, the fictional character and the structure of beliefs and ideas that sustain a sense of being an independent character with his own story.
"That Which Is, I Am" is the only truth. Infinitely Existing, That I am, Consciousness, Pure Presence pouring out. Everything else is part of the dream, Maya, an illusion.
The realization of the falsehood of the "I" implies initiating an honest process of deconstruction. This is not at all a process of self-development or personal search, on the contrary it is a radical and honest demolition of all that I hold as true regarding who I believe I am and the ideas that construct my character in this body-mind. Everything that is not. Nothing is left standing.
Nisargadatta Maharaj used the term "Neti Neti" which means "not this, not that". Nothing is left standing. There is no truth within the dream, everything is illusion.
"By contemplating who you are not,
the reality of who you are
emerges by itself."
- Nisargadatta Maharaj -
"Belief in things that are untrue is what imprisons us in the dream state. We must question all our beliefs, ideas, opinions and assumptions until we reach the very source of our being, until what is true, real and eternal reveals itself. "I am" is the absolute truth. Everything else is a belief. Consciousness is everything.”
- Adyashanti -
Total comprehension, the realization of the truth of the non-existence of a sense of separation, occurs without prerequisites or apparent path. It happens when and if it has to happen. On the other hand, the process of awakening is a conscious effort within the dream that implies an intention within this apparent fictitious character who seeks his own destruction. It is not Comprehension in itself but a process that inclines toward the honest realization of falsehood.
Self-inquiry
At the heart of Buddhism, "Ignorance" (Avidya) is considered the root of suffering. Avidya, Ignorance, does not refer to the lack of knowledge but to the misunderstanding of the nature of reality, especially the nature of the absence of an independent "I". So, ignorance is not about not knowing something but the kind of ignorance in which you hold something that is not true! Illuminate that falsehood and let it go.
What is true about who I am?
What is true? or Who am I?, is the question at the center. Use this self inquiry relentlessly as a tool to penetrate through all layers of ego and illusion.
In the process of untruth realization, one dismantles one's fictional character by peeling off the layers of false identity until all that remains is that which cannot be cut, destroyed or further reduced; the final truth, the point of consciousness "I am".
In the process of self-inquiry we encounter a particular characteristic that often blocks the development of our process. Many of our opinions and beliefs are held in a belief system of assumptions that we do not take into consideration. We don't even question them because we don't see them. We take them as true and begin to question other ideas rooted in these assumptions that have been assumed to be true.
Observe the questions
When you ask a question to another person, you expect a logical and direct answer. But when you ask yourself a fundamental question, the question itself can be the obstacle to progress, not the lack of an answer.
Most questions are built upon several assumptions that have not been verified first. This implies that we accept as true things that cannot be accepted as true.
A well formulated question is the key, not the answer. So, stick to the question. When you have a question, first observe it and verify all your assumptions contained in the question.
Don't worry about the answer, just get the right question or the destruction of it, dissolving it, making it irrelevant, absurd and, along with it, many layers of deception.
The need of becoming radically skeptical
It is difficult for us to distinguish ideas that are blindly accepted by the mass mentality. We are programmed from childhood to not being able to perceive "consensual reality".
We never look because we never doubt, and we never doubt because we are full of assumptions we do not question. We accept appearances and blindly ride the wave of consensus. We become less and less incredulous every day in order to adapt to the consensus, to the credulous mentality of the masses.
We are programmed from childhood to suspend disbelief and allow ourselves to pretend that reality is real, but if we want to stop pretending and discover what is really real, we have to hook up our critical system of disbelief again and become furiously, fanatically, pathologically skeptical.
It is not the lie we believe that keeps us asleep, but the lie we never question. No amount of skepticism could be too extreme. Truth does not require your devotion, it needs you to open your eyes. Being skeptical, you are not defending a position, you are sharing your honest observations, honest to the core, transcending the sacred and the unquestionable sacred beliefs. The realization of truth requires nothing more than purity of intention.
Every practice or path is not a challenge for the ego
"The only thing the mind can do is discover the unreal as unreal. The problem is only mental. Abandon false ideas. That is all. There is no need for real ideas. There is none that is."
- Nisargadatta Maharaj -
The spiritual quest is the art of walking in very small circles. This has two consequences: the first is that it creates the illusion that one is in motion, that one is going somewhere; and the second is that it prevents one from stopping, reaching stillness, which is when one looks around and sees the futility of everything. But above all, it has the particularity that it poses no challenge for the ego, that is, for the sense of the individual self. Striving to be "spiritual" reinforces the sense of self, which is quite the opposite of doing something that might harm it in some way or, even more, lead it to death.
There is literally nothing you have to do to get anywhere or to become anything. The only thing keeping you from seeing it is this damned insistence on clinging to those ragged little possessions as if they were your only belonging; that is, your clinging to the idea that you are someone. This belief, this tale that there is a person there loaded with valuable memories and wounds and dreams and hopes and aspirations and attributes and thoughts and theories; that's what you hold so tightly against your chest as you embark on the search, and that's what prevents you from finding anything, seeing where you are and realizing what You are.
Any practice or path is irrelevant
Actually, you have to let go of that. It's that simple. There's not much chance of awakening as long as there is a clinging to an "I".
Any story or practice will be of no help to you, and it may be an enormous hindrance to you. Like every practice, every path, every teaching, every attempt, every thought, every book.
All ideas, all words, all books, all teachings are out of place. In reality, the only thing to do is to let go completely and go beyond; to go, completely, beyond. Then everything will cease, nothing will ever have been, and only Comprehension and Peace remain that transcends all understanding.
The seeking community is enchanted with the instructors, the teachings, the search and the awakening, but from here it is very obvious that there is nothing to seek and nothing to teach.
There is no "sense" or "purpose". The dream characters, simple movie characters in this Soap Opera that is life, spend their lives in anguish trying to discover their purpose. They take themselves so seriously! From here we witness and know that all suffering, all anguish, all longing, loss, pain, confusion, harm, all trying with all the damned forces, all this is part of the substance of the dream, all this is our creation in our attempts to get out of where we are not.
The only real help that everything you are doing can bring is that you spend your whole life doing it until you realize that it is worthless, that it leads nowhere. Forget it. "The Tao that can be spoken of is not the true Tao." (These are the famous lines that Lao Tse's Tao Te Ching begins with.) The story that can be told is nothing but noise.
Who is, in stillness, the "I" that Is? That's what you're looking for. Not this.
Dismantling the sacred and tradition
Hold nothing sacred, holy or divine; only true or false. Everything that you consider sacred and profound is against the process of awakening. Accept seriously any questioning and do not consider anything sacred. The fact that you hold nothing sacred means that nothing is assumed to be true and that all your assumptions are a fair game. The more spiritual they are, the more impartial they should be. Ultimately, the most important thing to question is your most sacred and unchallenged assumptions about yourself, others, and life.
Tradition is just a word for the beliefs you accept as true without having verified them for yourself. Tradition is the deep path that is formed after many years of being traveled by the herd. The uncritical acceptance, typical of the herd mentality, is the fertile soil in which all false beliefs take root. Instead of their own self-reliance and self-determination, most people buy a belief system where thinking is not required.
For those who consider themselves alternative seekers, simply keep in mind that running separate from the herd is certainly better than running with it, but of no substantial difference if you are still running in the same direction.
Don't believe in the strength of traditions even though they have been held in honor for many generations and in many places; don't believe anything because many people talk about it. Remember that craziness is a numbers game. If enough people believe it, then it' s no longer so crazy.
There is only Presence and illusion. All content is illusory. There is no exception.
The absolute is completely atheistic and impersonal.
One of the truly amazing things about all this is to realize that the entire tradition, history, and human tendency toward "spirituality," "holiness," and the "sacred" are completely derailed. They are a complete misunderstanding. There is nothing holy or spiritual or sacred or divine in All That Is. The absolute is entirely atheistic. It is completely and categorically impersonal from beginning to end. The human tendency toward the mysterious, the supernatural and the divine is just that: a tendency, part of the programming of the mind/body organisms.
There is nothing spiritual or holy about realizing that the one who thinks he feels spirituality or holiness does not really exist. It is only What It Is.
"You see, the quest takes you away from yourself; it goes in the totally opposite direction; it has no relationship at all. The search is always directed in the wrong direction, so that everything that seems very deep to you, everything that you consider sacred, is a contamination in that consciousness. You may not like the word 'contamination', but everything that you consider sacred and profound is a contamination."
- U. G. Krishnamurti -
What is really unique about the characters called "spiritual seekers," those who claim to want to awaken, is that, while affirming such a thing, they are at the same time unconsciously spending almost all their time and energy actively doing what they can to prevent the awakening. Seriously. You may think I am exaggerating, but I am not. Seekers talk of awakening and enlightenment, but almost none have the slightest idea of what they are saying. They talk about it as if it is about something that they can achieve, reach, "attain," and that will change themselves and their way of experiencing life. It is evident that these dream characters have at some point absorbed a dreamed idea about "awakening" which apparently evokes some kind of change in the dream, although it is evident that it does not involve a real awakening, as this will necessarily lead to the dream and themselves ceasing to exist as such.
Shamanism and Metaphysics
Practices, paths, religions, shamanism, any wisdom considered sacred, ancient, based on tradition and sustained for centuries, everything is an illusion equally, a projection beautifully created by the ego.
Any elaborated display of rituals and ceremonies is the illusory display of an egoic role as opposed to simply being present in authenticity.
Any metaphysical or esoteric symbology or ideology is just another belief system that needs to be overcome and transcended so that any real non-dual awakening work can be carried out. They have no relevance to the inexistent personal awakening.
For example, in an ayahuasca ceremony, if someone sees a deceased relative in a vision, the person could then develop a story about how their work is "to clear the ancestral line" or other metaphysical speculation of this kind. Based on their visions, people create "missions" for themselves, and give them a sense of purpose, or create a narrative of their own victimization and suffering. However, whether as a victim or as a spiritual hero, none of this is fundamentally true. All are imagined ego viewpoints. A form of personal narrative, a projection to continue dreaming and make sense of the dream.
If you want to keep a commitment, it is with the truth. If you want to walk towards some destination, the only destination aligned with the truth is the deconstruction of the ego, of the fictional character, the constructed identity that we confuse with the pure direct experience of Being.
As you awaken, you will find that rituals, ceremonies and spiritual practices will probably begin to appear more and more like a waste of time and energy, and more and more like delusional ego games.
Religion and spirituality are things in which egos are involved in a subtle search for meaning, they do not represent the truth at all. They fulfill social functions and satisfy various egoic and psychological needs, but they are not real in any meaningful sense. In the light of awakening they will increasingly appear as a waste of time, pointless and unnecessary. So, in the long run, if you are really doing this work, you will probably realize that you will have to get away from any of these communities or practices.
The time for foolishness and ego games is over. The simple fact of being does not require any religious belief or spiritual practice. Religion and spirituality are only for egos.
Buddhism
The Buddhist concept "all sentient beings" is supposed to be inclusive: we have to honor all sentient beings, work for the liberation of all sentient beings... But in reality it is incomplete and exclusive. It is anthropocentric: we honor sentient beings because, due to their sensitivity, we recognize that they are like "us". But what about trees, grass leaves, dust moccasins, water molecules, that piece of mud, dirt, stone, steel, oil, plastic? That "... is and has always been everything."
When it is said that the world is samsara or illusion, it doesn't mean that nothing exists. There is ALL THAT IS! What happens is that the delusion consists of perceiving it as separate matter, which it is not. It is God. Love Ananda. Only that it appears to be matter, rage, pen, cat, prayer, solstice, hummingbird, death, scrambled eggs before the identified consciousness (an organism body/mind) that believes to be someone who is living a life in a world.
The concern for others and the sense of importance linked to the whole theme of awakening find their highest traditional expression in the bodhisattva vow. The concept of bodhisattva is the quintessence and the most beautiful thing about Buddhism: sacrificing your own enlightenment until everyone achieves "realization". It is the summit of altruism, of self sacrifice and of the highest willingness, and moves the theme of "no one has greater love than this" to a higher plane.
Beautiful; can there be any greater human aspiration? It is absolutely sweet and magnificent, and I hate to be the one who spoils so much beauty, but it is pure showmanship. It is nothing more than a thought totally linked to the dream. It is a marvelous melodrama, tearful and romantic, but as soon as the awakening happens you see that it is completely irrelevant. That idea arises only in the dream because then the "individuals" seem real. If the individual really is the son of a sterile woman (that is, if he neither exists nor ever existed), then who is there that can sacrifice himself and who is there for whom to sacrifice yourself? And, of course, the same is true of the Christian concept of Jesus "dying for our sins". All of this is a dramatic nonsense that I tend to call " foolishness" or, in Maharaj's terms, "great show".
This is a difficult matter for many. Perhaps the apparent indifference by which the Comprehension contemplates these things in human life that appear to be so dramatically "important" and "spiritual" may be perceived by normal and well-meaning people as coldness of heart. But it is not that, it is quite the opposite; there is total compassion, but I do not know of any wise man who has been able to explain this adequately and who has bridged this gap. There is a gap: from a human perspective, the bodhisattva represents the highest virtue; from a Comprehension point of view, it is irrelevant nonsense yet, in a way, it is tender.
Of course, it is a venerable tradition, along with karma. Now one should ask, whose karma?
There's no authority. You are on your own
Take your dog for a walk one night. Say, "Hey, look," and point dramatically at the Moon. Your dog will most likely stare at your finger expectantly. The animal shows great devotion, and that's very compelling, but it demonstrates a fundamental lack of understanding of any ability to see beyond. To become stuck in history, or in elements of the Teaching, or in practices, or in a guru or an instructor, or in spiritual experiences, is to stare at the finger without realizing that it is only an indication. None of these things has the least importance in itself. Extend your gaze beyond them and direct it to the place where they point.
Truth does not need teachings, it does not require any guru, and it is not a spiritual journey. The realization of truth is not a spiritual path and never was. The last thing you need is more knowledge. Awakening is not a theoretical discipline that is mastered through study and understanding. Much of the teachings you will read in your life are a finger pointing to the finger pointing to the moon instead of the moon.
Remember, there is no external authority. You have to verify everything for yourself, directly, without the obstruction and filters of interpreters or middlemen. You are on your own. The first rule in this business is that you are on your own.
Right now, as humanity, we are living our worst case scenario. So don't trust the beliefs we see around us as the norm. Cultivate both a mind and a skeptical approach. Open your eyes. Look. Nourish your discontent. Start fresh. Think for yourself. Trust in self-reliance. You are completely on your own.
Most spiritual seekers go after noble, loving, and flawless teachers and spiritual instructors, who are likely to be placed on a pedestal and able to show by example the way out of all the dark and chaotic negative aspect of life.
All this is fantasy. Listen: there is no escape. What you want to get rid of, what you reject, what you don't want to be, what you don't want your teachers to be, all that is It. It is Presence, it is Consciousness. It is this, it is here. No one needs a spiritual master to teach you something more, and even less one on a pedestal. There is nothing else. The illusion is precisely to judge that something belongs either to the "dark side" or to the "luminous side". If you have not become disillusioned with your spiritual master, then he is not doing his job. The spiritual masters who deserve the bread they earn are in the business of disillusionment.
Kill the Buddha
When we hear the phrase "Kill the Buddha!", it means move on. Let go of what you are holding to be the truth and move on. Whatever it is, whoever it is, it is just another projection of your own illusion. Kill the thing, drop it and move on. That's what it means.
In the Zen tradition, when a student suddenly experiences an incredible state of mystical union, believing that he has reached a state of personal realization, it is common for the teacher to take him out of his dream by splashing him with cold water and calling them "makyo". Makyo means that those beautiful flowers he is collecting, only have value in the reality he is trying to leave behind.
The Tao says, "Beware of the flowery traps, for in order to possess them or take advantage of them, you must stop your journey and remain in the dream. Breaking the illusion takes away everything you own. The price of truth is everything. Everything. That is the rule and it is inviolable.
Honesty
There is nothing spiritual about untruth realization. It is the search for truth, raw, radical and honest. This implies first of all a complete and total recognition of the illusory nature of all manifestation, all beliefs and practices manifesting as appearances within the absolute state of full Presence. Everything is an illusory content. It is to see Maya's game and to open your eyes to pure truth. It is a path of radical deconstruction of the fictional character we have created and of the collection of false beliefs he holds.
This is a path that is only adopted when it feels absolutely necessary. If you believe that awakening is a path you are attracted to, it is because you don't understand what it means. It means the death of your self and the beautiful beliefs that make you feel special. It is a path that will leave you bewildered awake on a planet of sleepwalkers.
Honesty is the most important ingredient in the process of untruth realization. You need a courageous, radical and impeccable honesty. To realize the falsehood of the "I" we must be radically skeptical of ALL that we hold to be true.
The first recognition, and this has no exceptions, is the recognition that there is only Full Presence, Consciousness, What Is, and that ALL the content we hold is illusory in nature, ALL without exception. Any practice, belief or path that you hold as certain is as illusory as any other, for all content within the Presence is equally illusory.
Awakening requires you to let go of the character, or at least be recognized for what it is, an illusion, a role that you are holding, an idea that you have decided to adopt because it gives meaning to your life and gives you a sense of identity, of belonging, of personal importance, it gives you the feeling of being someone, of contributing, of purpose. It gives you an emotionally valuable feeling in one of those lines.
That's why deconstructing the personal self is not a pleasant process, or a process that we consciously choose. Who in their right mind would want to dismantle their most valuable treasure? For the answer is, only he who can no longer bear to live in an illusion which is not bringing him inner peace. Awakening is not something that is chosen to become more "spiritual", it is something that is born by the feeling of discontent, of feeling that something stinks and that you have to move in another direction, the opposite direction, the radical deconstruction, dismantling the illusion.
External honesty is the commitment to be honest with others.
To say what you really think and feel. To speak your truth without fear. To confront the social repercussion of being honest with yourself.
Socially, most of the time we are all conditioned to do exactly the opposite. We pretend to be polite and kind, and many times that means not saying what we really think in order to facilitate the process of social interaction and maintain cultural beliefs, religion, politics and society within the socially accepted consensus.
Speaking your truth with respect and crude honesty may be seen as a radical act but if you commit to being true to yourself, you will be willing to endure the social repercussions of being honest. In the long run, it will make you healthier and happier, as you will be more aligned with the true energy of reality and will be more able to see falsehood in many levels of understanding and communication.
My only interest is my commitment to the truth and nothing else. Today I allow myself to embody that fully.
Think of all the time, effort and energy you invest in projecting that fictional character into the world, in playing your role, in being "you". Now, imagine not needing to do it anymore. Imagine if you could stop projecting that character who strives to fit in and simply be. How would your life be different if you didn't have to be creating yourself in existence at every moment and simply exist?
And on the other side of this coin there is your inauthentic desire to reflect the ego of others as they reflect you. What if you break this social pact of mutual self-affirmation of these elaborate fictitious characters? What if you could put aside these two activities that consume so much time and energy? What if you take away all the energy from the fictitious character you play? And now, what if everyone did the same?
Let go of the character and his opinions and beliefs. Calm down, there's no idea to defend, no path to follow, no place to go. Everything simply Is.
Every manifestation happens within the dream, and the dream is totally illusory. There is no aspect of the dream that is of a non-illusory nature. Everything is illusory. There is no path or practice or teaching that is less illusory than another; they are all equally illusory. Everything simply Is. Only silence, Presence, Witnessing remain. Happening. There is no doer, only Presence.
Surrender
Surrender refers to releasing completely the idea of one's own individual existence. It is the full surrender to death of the individual self, including, ironically enough, all those hopes and dreams of ever becoming a good or better person, or a person whom others may love or who is liked by others or who is attractive to others. It is complete surrender to "This Is All That Exists".
At some point the question will arise: is it really necessary to die completely, to surrender everything? Is there a more moderate or a little less radical way to carry this forward, some middle road yet to be discovered that does not require rejecting this life or myself as an individual?
The fundamental Comprehension is that you do not exist as an entity or individual agent, but only as an object in the dream of Consciousness. All this bargaining in relation to surrender and death is nothing more than the attempt on the part of that illusory agent, of that non-existent doer, of that fictional individual, to carry on with his mythical life. Nisargadatta Maharaj used to equate the individual ego with the "son of a sterile woman". It is hard for any individual to take this seriously and accept that his existence is nothing more than a myth, a mental construct. But without this total acceptance, without this complete surrender, Comprehension, enlightenment, awakening is, by definition, impossible.
The very foundation of Comprehension is that you are not. This truth cannot be accepted without at the same time surrendering every vestige of the idea that one is. Totally.
Only the one who loses his life will find it.